Pairing(s): Akame, Jin/OC, KoKame
Rating: this one PG-13 (higher later)
Genre: AU. angst, and romance, i think. if it's akame than it's always romance... but that's interesting how it came up being angsty - i hate angst.
Beta by: -
Disclaimer: I'd owned them but they ran away and left for japan. Traitors *gulping her whiskey*
Summary: I'm bad at it... Jin found out that his sensei had an affair with one of the students. When he saw that student he knew that he would make him his. Only his.
Author Note: that's the first time i post in like 5 years. 5 years my muse was playing with me, coming and leaving, promising and then crashing all my hopes. I hated her, i loved her. She took different forms... Extremely different... And now my muse splitted herself in two boys. Also that's my first attempt at posting something that i wrote in english. Hell... that's probably the first time i really post my work hoping that smn will read it and comment at it. Oh, and I don't like my writing style (i
I. The Summer.
well, that's it. That's called - all the angst in one go.
hope, you'll like.
But i'm really scared though. I think it's not what everybody who commented and had read but didn't comment was waiting.
But it's longer)))
*Hitoshi - just in case that someone doesn't know - Jin's name can be read as Hitoshi. In one really old magazine, when Jin was first mentioned, they made a mistake)))
II. The Fall.
- I can’t stand it anymore! That’s it! I don’t want to see you again! Leave, now! Go!
She screamed at him, falling on her knees to the ground. She burst out of tears, crying and crying. Her whimpers echoed loudly in the cold apartment.
He was looking at her with an indifferent expression. It wasn’t that he didn’t regret what he’d done but he knew it was pointless to seek forgiveness. He’d done too much for that matter.
Abusing, hurting, being rough, ignoring and, the most horrible one, not loving her back. He’d done all those things though he didn’t feel sorry.
He met Aya at the university and with his looks he quickly got her legs widely spread. Not that she was one of those sluts, no, she was completely different. She was just too naïve thinking of him as an angel. Not a devil he really was. She was cute, caring, beautiful, and intelligent, from a good family.
He started dating her. He was a real gentleman to her – feeding her in expensive restaurants, visiting churches and museums with her, eating out on the picnics in those family parks on shiny days and all that jazz.
He even thought that he loved her back. That he could finally recover. But he was wrong.
When they got married he thought that was what he’d always needed. He wanted a child, a little girl. They were obviously too young for having kids – marriage at 23, kids at 24, and what’s left, then? Aya asked him, while arguing about the kids again and again. A tree, he thought. He was supposed to grow a tree.
She wanted a career, she wanted her own money to spend, and she was too independent. Of course, she liked when he spent money on her, but she wanted them to buy such big things as a flat and a car together. She hated the only thought about sitting at home, with a ladle in one hand and a small baby in the other. She was too young for it, she tried to reason to him.
And slowly he started feeling that his usual self was back. He ignored her calls, hadn’t been coming home sometimes for several days. He started drinking, partying. After those parties he always came home smelling of whiskey, sweat and women.
Aya started paying him more attention than she’d already been. She thought that a homemade food, a hot bath and a slow affectionate sex could make him fall in love with her again. She thought that he’d simply cooled off her, hoping she would be able to turn everything back.
But she was completely wrong. He just hadn’t felt any love from the beginning not just grew cold.
He was really rough to her. Not only in the way he had treated her, but in bed too. Sometimes she couldn’t even get up for the whole day, just lying there. Crying.
If he tried to remember her now he would be able to imagine only her crying face. He really forgot how cute she was while smiling.
And here they were. She was packing her small bag as quickly as possible trying hard not to look at him and search for forgotten love in his eyes for the umpteenth time.
- I really hope you’ll find your happiness, Jin. I wasn’t able to give it to you. And you failed in giving it to me. I hope we’ll never see each other again.
With that said she closed the door of now his apartment.
He clicked his tongue. She couldn’t even leave in a way that didn’t leave him angry with her.
I hope you’ll never be satisfied. You are pathetic.
Kazuya was right back then. He couldn’t be satisfied with anything. He didn’t like his job so he left it. He didn’t like his wife so he made her leave too. He didn’t even like his university. He became a journalist because his mother had wanted him to.
Yeah, Kazuya was completely right. He really was pathetic. He didn’t have any interest in his life anymore.
8 years. It had been 8 years since he last saw his Kazuya. That boy ripped his soul out and tore it into pieces.
Kamenashi Kazuya left for Osaka in a month after that accident in the dressing room aiming to become a professional baseball player. The rumors told Jin that Kazu became quite famous there.
It was his dream too, to become a professional footballer. His mother was against that idea. As the only parent she’d always dreamed of Jin becoming one of the best lawyers or journalists in Tokyo. She herself was a mere nurse in a hospital trying desperately to give him a warm house, ironed clothes and a good education.
But he failed. He just wasn’t suited to that kind of job. Writing stupid articles about new built houses, lately held meetings, newly opened galleries and such.
He left that newspaper knowing perfectly well he wouldn’t find anything better.
Though he became quite famous in certain circles. He loved writing stories. Erotic stories. He posted them under the nickname Kame in special magazines. The readers of those magazines really liked his stories waiting for them to come every week.
He always wrote in those stories about a certain pair. The girl was named Kazuko, the boy – Hitoshi*. The readers didn’t even know if the writer himself was a male or a female. Sometimes the stories were full of violence, sometimes they were a complete fluff.
Jin sighed. If he was to remember then, he’d never been gentle to Aya in bed. Never been satisfied with her.
Just like he said.
First he thought it was because he couldn’t be sated with her. But as the time passed he understood that she couldn’t give him what he wanted. He was becoming rough desperately trying to seek that unknown satisfaction in her but nothing happened. And Aya couldn’t say that he hadn’t tried because he had.
He had always been desperately trying to find something.
He finished his cigarette and walked into the convenient store. It had been a month since Aya left him and somehow he felt relieved he couldn’t hurt her anymore. He even saw her walking with her friend laughing and smiling. He was surprised – he himself had seen her smile quite a long time ago.
Well, her smile really suites her, that was what he thought, while passing them without being noticed. Not feeling anything.
Jin cursed a little, not really wanting to think about it, while crouching on the floor to fish out not opened or torn packet of rice.
He had a lot free time to summarize his life. First of all, he didn’t have a job. He wrote that plot less smut but it wasn’t really for money. Secondly, he was almost divorced. Thirdly, he wasn’t satisfied with his life at all. Fourthly, Jin thought, taking 3 packs from the counter, he ran out of cigarettes.
There was one another point, though.
- Kazu, when will you stop buying those things? They are expensive and too sweet. You’ll be toothless at, like, 30. Oh, and fat. Like, really fat.
- Shut up, Koki. I’m not fat!
Jin smiled at the heartwarming name. Kazuya. He turned his head to look at the owner of that beautiful name. And his world stopped spinning.
There was standing a young man with the black silken hair, pink pouty lips, crooked nose, perfect eyebrows, and those unchanging mischievous eyes - the most beautiful face he’d ever seen. He was laughing and hugging the guy he was with, whispering something in his ear. Stylish clothing, everything was neat and perfect. Just like he was and always had been.
Jin’s legs almost gave up under him if he hadn’t grabbed the counter. He couldn’t believe his eyes. His Kazuya was there, only 5 steps from him.
He imagined himself running to him, hugging, kissing…
Jin ran out of the shop as fast as he could. He should make a plan.
His lost Kazuya will be his completely this time.
Kazuya, you’ll be mine again.
III. The Winter.
IV. The Spring.
V. The Summer.
Yeah, I forgot to say who had inspired this "sweet story of mine". The yaoi manga by Kyugo... and the "No Longer Human" by Osamu Dazai. This book is really something and if you're interested i really suggest you reading it. It's worth it.