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[personal profile] isolated_killer
Title: I want to become Scarlett O'Hara
Pairing: Bem/Bela, Bem/Koizumi Kyoko
Wordcount: 5,300
Rating: PG-13
Genre/Warning: a kind of romantic disaster.
Notes: The scenes take place in 1984*thus no mentions of Natsume and Bem’s girly crush and happen in a private porn theatre that went bankrupt; because there was a great number of various movie theatres in the 70s, but the appearance of cheap VCRs on the market in the early 80s led to a closure of many of them. Scarlett O'Hara is the main protagonist of the most famous romance novel and movie Gone with the Wind. Also, please, note that in this universe, Kyoko was born in 1939, not in 1966, because, otherwise, she’d only be 18 in 1984 and that doesn’t go well with this story, which is fictional anyways :P
Notes#2: Written for wonderful [personal profile] bellemelody at Kame Rarepair Mini Exchange.
Summary: Bela is desperate to try this one thing humans are very much addicted to. Kyoko wants to try Bem. Bem stays oblivious. Belo is forever too little for any of this.

“We will never become humans, right? Then, I want to try it… with you”

When Bela says these words, her voice containing a hint of desperation, Bem thinks he can understand her. He doesn’t mind the way she is cornering him in their dusty boxroom, doesn’t mind her annoyingly loud whisper and passing glances as if she is afraid Belo will return from his walk earlier than usual and find them in such a discreditable situation he will sure prod them later about. Bem only nods, hesitancy written in his stance, as he gives a brief look at her white knuckles on his forearms, with so much force she’s pressing unmoving Bem into the wall. She gives a nervous smile at his silent reply, shaking him a little in gratitude; the single bulb dangling from the ceiling illuminates her dark red lips, crooked smile seems wicked in the play of light, and Bem can’t quite put his finger on the feeling of anxiety that arises within him. Bela wants his help. But Bem is not so sure he will be able to assist her in this.

---

The Northern town they move in this time welcomes them with cold wind and prickly snow. There’s a reason for avoiding the south, its warm seasonal breeze, salty caustic water and free seafood, having something to do with fireworks and Belo’s excitement and, later, a major disguise fiasco. Bem’s stone-cold fingers firmly keep hold of his hat, careful not to lose the precious item in the wild storm, his cane squeezed in his fist as he continues marching along the streets, his pace steady. Bela and Belo, on the other hand, are struggling to catch up with him, as the storm successfully prevents them from moving forward; Belo’s too tired and sleepy to continue the seemingly endless walk and he keeps clinging to irritated Bela, who carries the heavy uncomfortable trunk, at the same time one-handedly keeping Belo from falling on the ground. The wind tousles her hair and flutters under her purple cloak, blowing it away, as if on purpose unraveling the hints of monstrous essence on her temples and shoulders; even the wind doesn’t want us here, a sad thought strikes Bem and he gives out a depressed sigh. “What are you sighing about?! Better find us a place to stay, the quicker, the better!” Bela shouts at him, prodding him with her sharp nail and Bem nods, his heavy thoughts forgotten. He must find them a new house.

-


They spend their first night in the town under a bridge; there’s a distinct smell of urine in every corner but it’s shielded from the wind and dry from snow thus better than nothing. Belo falls asleep immediately as he settles on the old blanket laid out for him by Bela, who seems too tired to comment on their choice of lodging for the night and just silently follows right after the little one, her face – a tired, grumpy mask. Bem leaves them like that; he can’t take a rest yet, he must find them a shelter more decent. His reconnaissance doesn’t have to last long though, as a few miles and few empty houses later he finds a half-abandoned Cinematheque; big foreign letters are plastered over the shady-looking entrance, peeling paint creating an illusion of decorations forgotten after a feast that ended decades ago. The place seems lonely and dusty enough to reassure Bem this is what they’re searching for. Next morning finds them crowded in the tiny room in the basement. Cinematheque becomes their new home.

-

Sooner than later, Belo the little explorer is prone to make an exciting discovery; Cinematheque turns out to be more than what Bem has thought of it first. The seemingly useless two-storeyed building stands abandoned because of reasons which are beyond the three of them, yet the spacy hall with twenty rows of same looking chairs covered by cheap red cloth and a big dusty screen on the wall indicate that this place had once been used to gather people here; they sat in these chairs, talked to each other, made friends with their interlocutors. The trio doesn’t pay much attention to the screen, too busy making up new theories on the purpose of such an incredible place; Belo smiles lopsidedly and calls Cinematheque a Hall of Friends, lisping. Bela doesn’t show her agreement, but by the way she’s stroking armrests of her seat in the very first row, Bem can tell she is positive this hall was used for something that amazing. Later that day, while exploring the upper floor, they find a big intimidating machine; it has two huge wheels on the side of it and a lot of multicolored buttons which Belo continues to press eagerly till Bela snaps at him to stop, “You never know what exactly you might press! What if you blow us up, you rogue!” Bem expertly distracts them from the argument, long pale finger pointing at a number of odd circles lined up against the wall; they’re light brown on the outside, but have a big hole right in the centre and there’s a narrow strip of black plastic wrapped around its middle, the edges a lot longer than the width the plastic actually does take up. With no idea of what it might be, Belo unwinds the black strap off the nearest circle and is giddy to find this kind of plastic light and fun to fondle with; “It’s like a ribbon,” Bela comments distractedly, her interested eyes scanning over the thing in her hand. Bem nods, only to pat Belo lightly with his cane when the little one throws the first uncoiled circle at Bela and tries reaching for the next one. Bem shakes his head at him. They should not touch any stuff that is not theirs.

-

A few days later, while Belo and Bela are away searching for edible plants and roots, a strange woman pays their new home a visit. Bem senses her presence, sniffs at her perfume and watches the way she freely walks through the entrance; she seems cautious as the glass door slams behind her with a loud bang and glances around warily as if afraid someone would jump her. If Bem took careful notice of her appearance, he’d probably think she was a woman in her forties, nonetheless still very beautiful indeed, her skin tinted with a bit of pink indicating that she had been in a hurry, the smooth of her hair ruffled due to the wind creeping around street corners. But for someone who has never known the fear of ageing, Bem thinks nothing of her look; in his hiding place, the only thought that visits him is that the fragile female can do no harm. So he gets a bit startled when he hears the woman demand him to come out, her voice loud and clear in the dead silence of the entrance hall, “I know someone’s living here; better come out now or I will call the police!” The last thing Bem wants is to inflict trouble on himself and his counterparts: a meeting with policemen can turn out to be a disaster with their common tendency to get monstrously hot-headed when overwhelmed with emotions. So he readjusts his hat just to be sure it does cover his head and steps out his hiding spot with his eyes downcast, cane held behind his back.

-


He excuses himself the moment she jumps up at the sound of the door closing behind Bem’s back. He doesn’t look at her, just stares at the floor, yet his face is a palette of sadness and guilt, his shoulders hunched as to show the sincerity of his words; he is deeply sorry for trespassing the woman’s premises and he will immediately leave if she gives him time to gather his poor belongings without calling the police… His little speech gets interrupted by the woman herself when Bem suddenly finds her standing right in front of him, her eyes scanning his face, her mouth half-opened in a surprised gasp. He gulps nervously, afraid she has somehow noticed he is not a human being like herself but his thoughts are actually too far from the reality; when one of the neighbors told her they had seen strangers come and go out of her brother’s movie theatre, she imagined said strangers to be dirty, stinky homeless people who had never known a toothbrush and a comb, with scabs all over their mugs. But now when she’s actually taken a look at this stranger’s face, she is sure a man will have to search the world for a very long time to find another gorgeous being like the one in front of her. She keeps staring at him, amazed at the man’s beauty, ignoring the worried look he’s giving her; he has the fairest skin compared to anyone’s she has ever met, his silver hair, probably, coloured as to follow some particular fashion, are thick and a single lock that is a hindrance to his beautiful deep sad eyes only adds a certain charm to his fine features. Before he has time to question her staring, she blurts out, “You can live here as long as you need,” and a small attractive smile is touching her lips.

-


Kyoko, is the woman’s name. A common Japanese name in comparison to the names of her new acquaintances, if she does say so herself; Bem, Bela and Belo. They sound so foreign and alien to her ears, she keeps rolling them on the tip of her tongue, pronouncing them with an amused look on her face, each time trying out a new intonation. Bem finds it quite strange how she thinks his name is particularly interesting, when he obviously can’t agree with her; he still can’t deny how there are times when he asks himself this one question; if one day they were created by one person, why he didn’t give the three of them the same names, why he gave Bem a different name from the ones of the other two of his creations. Another puzzle, among hundreds which are still to be solved, inwardly adds Bem, as a sad afterthought.

-


A few careful questions and a few very vague replies later, Kyoko understands that Bem, to put it mildly, is not a very talkative person. They are sitting in the small room Bem, Bela and Belo has decided to occupy with their belongings, the basement’s low ceiling and very bad ventilation making Kyoko frown. She can’t quite understand what relationship this illegally beautiful man has with his other two friends who he calls Bela and Belo; she inwardly guesses that Bela must be a female’s name and hopes the girl is not after Bem’s heart or body, because she doesn’t quite feel like being a homewrecker, yet. She does learn that the gorgeous man came from the south and that he has no permanent address, preferring the life of a wanderer. Kyoko nods, her eyes dreamy, finding his story strangely romantic, nevermind that she is forty five years old and still single.

-


When she decides to tell Bem the actual story of “Cinematheque” and the reason as to why such a useful building stands abandoned, her strategy being that if she opens her heart, he might open his as well, Bem is prone to feel pity for the owner of his new home, a bit bothered by the fact that he doesn’t quite understand some certain things Kyoko’s talking about and he is obviously missing the meanings of a few words to deeply feel the horror of the whole situation. But, as it turns out, just a few years ago, back in 1978, when no one owned a VHS at home and people had to go to the cinema to actually be able to watch movies, her brother Tomoya had decided to open his own porn theatre – porno films being the ultimate attraction of adult people and a very profitable one, too. It indeed compensated her brother’s efforts right up until 1982 when AVs became so popular people then preferred enjoying their guilty pleasure at home, rather than at a theatre where everyone could notice. So, devastated by the loss of his precious money and unable to run this kind of place anymore, Tomoya had left for Okinawa in search of a better life, thus leaving this estate to his sister, Kyoko, to look after, as he was still too attached to the place to completely drop it. Kyoko finishes her story with a faint smile on her lips, eyes focused on her interlocutor whose sad eyes seem even sadder now, when he has learned the truth behind this building. That is why she can’t hold back a surprised gasp when it turns out she is mistaking his confusion for the sorrow; she thinks he’s literary shitting her when he excuses himself and asks in a small voice what the actual meaning of the word Porn is.

-


Having spent almost half a century in this world, never been able to reach out of her small circle of relatives and her cloudy rainy little Northern city for a number of reasons, Kyoko still has a strong conviction there exists no other human purer than this Bem man in front of her. The lack of his knowledge about anything related to love and possible bonds between a woman and a man is astonishing. Despite his mature appearance, his deep sad eyes, the gaze of which can tell so many stories even when his lips stay sealed, and his old-fashioned clothes, he is a sheer preschooler in the questions of relationships. Half-serious, half-joking Kyoko can’t stop herself from asking if he happens to be still a virgin in his late twenties; not that Bem has mentioned his age anyways, but Kyoko is positive her guess hits the mark. But Bem’s only giving her a strange puzzled look from under his silver locks, his thoughts all messed up; he feels dangerously overwhelmed with this woman’s sudden kindness, he wishes to repay her in some way but he doesn’t know quite how. And she is indulging in this dangerous talk about actuals which are too far away from Bem’s understanding, and he is worried Kyoko might suspect something because Bem the Human Being is completely unaware of such a common thing as love. As his thoughts are running wild though, he misses the awkward glance she is giving him, wondering if his troubled eyes and this particular twist of his lips indicate the embarrassment he must be feeling because of her inability to stay silent; of course, no twenty-something guy in their right mind would admit to anyone he has never had a taste of woman before…

-


When Kyoko finally flaunts out into the windy street, the beautiful settling autumn sun lighting up her path rather brightly so Bem does not feel obliged to walk her home, she gives him quite a surprise by shoving a piece of paper in his hand. “This is my address; come visit me tomorrow. We still have a lot to talk about, Bem, dear,” she says to him in a languorous whisper, her eyes fixated on his face, a small smirk playing over her lips. As a response he gives a tiny half smile of his own, too shocked by her kindness towards an unknown person to be able to really see through her; what the best way to teach such a handsome young man the art of love is if not with her own body and mind? Kyoko’s question is very much rhetorical when she does not waste any second thoughts on her brilliant plan.

-


When a woman invites a subject of her infatuation to her room for a cup of tea, the tea obviously being the needed excuse to see the man of her choice sooner than later, the last things she’s expecting him to show up with are a girl of his own young age and a lovely little child who he’s holding hands with rather comfortably. A damn picture perfect, Kyoko thinks involuntarily dropping her wide smile and shifting her glances from the girl to the child and back to the girl, frozen at the threshold of her own apartment. Sensing the weird atmosphere that is creeping up like a spider in the corner, Bem croaks out brief introductions with a nod of his head; he does know that the first impression is vital in their situation and he hopes they won’t disappoint Kyoko’s expectations or cause her troubles by temporarily occupying the building her brother left her. Bem already finds her to be more than amazing for allowing them to stay there, so he is very careful not to hurt her feelings by seeming even more distant than they already are; he keeps telling himself this is the reason for bringing Bela and Belo to meet Kyoko, forgetting the nagging they both gave him when he said a stranger woman paid them a visit and indulged in the odd kinds of talk. Because the reasons Bela and Belo have for wanting to meet Kyoko are too different from Bem’s own – Belo wants to learn more about the theatre, the intimidating looking machine that stands on the second floor untouched because Bem has prohibited him from approaching it, and the purpose of circles with black plastic ribbons on them which he continues hogging in the secret. Bela, on the other hand, shows an interest so strong to know what Love is actually like, her eyes acquire a strange almost obsessed glint; she is desperate to ask her questions, that is why, when she sees no movement in the woman in the doors, she decides to hurry her up, “Hey, what are we standing here for? Why don’t you let us come in so we can all introduce each other properly and start talking?” Bem thinks someone should elbow Bela for looking almost dangerously eager to start the talking, her lips stretched in a wickedly wide smile, eyes sparkling. At this moment she does not look human enough even to Bem.

-


The three of them are settled on her tiny sofa designed for two in her tiny living room which is really, very tiny – but a perfect fit for such a tiny apartment. Bem is experiencing a rare moment when all his insides seem squished while Belo the little devil turns, fidgets and jumps up each time Bela shoves a cookie at him; it is better to keep Belo silent, because such an airhead has a tendency to answer strangers’ questions so honestly, it becomes painful to try and explain people what the little “boy” meant by calling himself a monster almost a century old. So, yes, better keep that cookie plate full. “If I’m not mistaken, you’re Bela and this is… Belo?” Kyoko starts awkwardly, having served the tea in small Japanese cups, staring at the two of Bem’s friends warily from her tiny chair that she preliminary moved closer to Bem’s side, just in case. But the cue is given, and Bela occupies the following talking, her speech hurried and full of unnatural giggling which she probably considers girly. Bem happily lets her; it is rare that Bela is willing to cooperate with a human on such early stages of their friendship. And Bela sure does talk, answering questions and explaining how they discovered this town, how they are so very grateful to Kyoko for letting them stay at the cinema and will she be willing to explain how the word Porn is connected to the word Love?

-


She is so savage, is the first thought that makes it to Kyoko’s paralyzed mind the moment Bela takes a step inside her apartment. Kyoko thinks there is an excessive amount of make-up on the girl’s face, her features prominent enough without the need to accentuate them even more; though, if she does pay a close look to Bela’s lips, she is not so sure any lipstick can give such a dark red tint that seems bloody at some certain play of light. She can’t stop herself from judging her old-fashioned dress either; the way it’s slipping over her figure with her cloak hugging her shoulders, Bela seems more like a wicked witch from a fairytale rather than a homeless young girl that has no point in living but wandering around the world in search of a better life. They don’t look good together, thinks Kyoko, wants to think anyways, but she can’t fight the reality; the trio does seem like one big happy family and if Bem seemed confused and puzzled about her mentions of love and bonding between males and females, he certainly must have just been embarrassed about discussing those delicate things with such an old hag like herself. Kyoko feels depression settle within her; for chances she never had in the first place, for wanting what’s not hers. But she continues to keep up the conversation, inwardly trying to restrain the ultimate feeling of regret that’s burning inside her heart, the feeling of annoyance towards this wild-looking girl whose gestures and loud voice seem to remind of ones of a man more often than not. That is why the fateful question so randomly inserted in the middle of a small uninteresting talk startles Kyoko so much she shrieks and loses her cup of tea somewhere on the carpet. Will I be willing to explain how the word Porn is connected to the word Love? Kyoko gives Bela a bewildered glance, thinking that if Bem’s obliviousness seems cute, Bela’s impolicy is more irritating than anything. “Is it really okay to speak about something like this in the presence of a child?” and that is how Bem and Belo find themselves on the opposite side of the door.

-


There is that point in time when Bela’s spending two days on end out of the house, the stuffy room no longer able to restrain her will to learn about the most enchanting subject in the world that is love. If Bela knew better, she probably wouldn’t take up listening to the stories of a forty five year old woman who is still living alone in a tiny apartment, her town lost and forgotten on the country’s map. But having no other source to study from, Bela’s absorbing everything she can from the woman who is sharing her experience with her, never minding if she does so willingly or not. Bem doesn’t mind, he is quite happy with the way things flow between Bela and her new acquaintance; the two of them, he and Belo, have spied enough to be assured Kyoko intends no harm and Bela keeps herself calm enough not to transform in the middle of the living room. He doesn’t know the topics of Bela and Kyoko’s conversations, not that he’s ready to pry, after being presented with a standoffish “It’s all girls’ talk, nothing of your concern,” after questioning her in the evening when she actually does visit to feed them. Belo pouts at her, complaining how she never has time for them these days, but Bem only smiles a little smile and nods, thinking he can understand women and their wish to keep everything a secret.

-


Frosty early November morning finds Bem marching along the already well-known road; his pace is steady, as always, the cane is squeezed in his fist, hat set low over his forehead. Frosty early November morning finds Bem frowning; Bela didn’t appear at home yesterday evening, and Belo refused to have dinner without her, having then fallen asleep sad and hungry. Not that Bem himself was in any mood to eat, a little disappointed by Bela’s questionable attitude and worried over the fact that it was not in her nature to be so careless as to forget about them. That is why next morning he feels obliged to come and pay a visit to Kyoko; Bem knows that Bela is there hoping he will be able to persuade her to go home with him, seeing how she has probably overstepped the limits of the woman’s kindness by spending a night at her place. He gets a bit startled though when he sees the very subject of his concerns, namely Bela herself, walk towards him, her step a bit wobbly, her eyes puzzled. He comes to a halt right in the middle of the road but very soon he understands that she does not see him; in fact, she seems not to notice anything, mechanically walking home, so deeply she is plunged in thought. When she almost passes by him, he calls out for her, his face – a question mark. “Oh, Bem! What are you doing here?!” She shrieks at him, surprised, her eyes suddenly shifty as if she is nervous. As if she feels nervous around Bem. Bem thinks she doesn’t really pay attention to his explanation about him going to fetch her from Kyoko’s place, and she proves him right when she suddenly interrupts him with a question, “Let’s meet at home today, okay? I need your help with something…” And that is when Bem suspects there is definitely something strange going on.

-


When Bem knocks on the entrance of Kyoko’s apartment twenty minutes later, he is bound to get yet another startle of the day when she slams the door open, her usually beautiful face - an angry mask, “Good lord, Bela, let me sleep for at least a few hours, please!” The following scene is very much silent, only disturbed by Kyoko’s gasp when she understands who she has just screamed at, but Bem only purses his lips and bows in apology for his early visit, hoping she won’t throw him out just yet, because he has a few important questions to ask. Contrary to his expectations though, she immediately lets him in, a sweet smile adorning her tired features; she’s apologizing for the mess that is her living room while Bem takes careful steps among a few piles of strange looking black boxes. As she makes tea for him, he holds one of the boxes closer to his eyes, inspecting its smooth plastic surface and two big white holes on one side - he sticks a finger into one of the holes out of curiosity, - but when he hears Kyoko give an exhausted sigh, he puts the box back on the floor and bows his head again, this time apologizing for the inconveniences Bela caused the kind woman. “Bela was, too, very interested in videocassettes; she has spent all day yesterday watching movies. It’s not that I am angry with her, no, it was great fun to go over all romantic films she could find, but now I’m so tired I will fall asleep anywhere possible,” Kyoko gives him a steaming cup of tea and takes a seat right next to him, wondering briefly if she is very obvious in her desire to make him pay attention to her and if she’s making him feel uncomfortable. If so, Bem doesn’t show it, not shifting away from his place on the sofa. “I never knew I actually had so many cassettes. I even have Waterloo Bridge with Vivien Leigh, which I don’t even remember buying in the first place.” Bem watches the heaps of videocassettes scattered around the floor and then looks up, not even realizing he has interrupted her in the middle of a sentence; he is sorry but he doesn’t really understand what has captured Bela’s interest so deeply. Kyoko’s reply is coupled with a mysterious smile as she puts a hand on his knee, without even turning an eyelash, Romance, my friend, is what interests your girlfriend. Romance.

---


“We will never become humans, right? Then, I want to try it… with you. ”

“I want to know what a kiss feels like. I want a kiss, Bem. ”

Bela’s words continue echoing in Bem’s ears even when the pressure on his forearms has decreased and Bela has actually remembered about the existence of personal space. She takes a step back, her eyes closed and she is taking mouthfuls of air as if in an attempt to calm down her fast-beating heart; Bem waits. His dark eyes seem to be penetrating her as he looks over her prominent features, inspects her expression; his concentration on her face is so intent, it comes as shock when Bela’s cold fingers coil up over his own and it seems like they are doing the thing humans call handholding. They seem to have frozen for the next couple of minutes, with the way the skin on Bela’s fingers feels waxen and the way Bem’s own breathing gets caught in his throat; he is afraid to lose the moment, break the spell cast over Bela who seems suddenly more relaxed than she’s ever been since their move to this Northern town. When she finally opens her eyes, it is to give Bem one of her rare warm smiles; her other unoccupied hand goes up to knock his hat away, just to get lost in his silver locks seconds later. The simple elastic band that always keeps his thick hair in a tail falls somewhere on the ground and Bem gets this distracting thought he will have to spend quite some time to find it later; he has no spare rubber of that kind. Out of sudden, he feels guilty for getting distracted by such a trivial thing, and he quickly shifts his eyes on the floor, out of habit; Bela notices the trick. and clicks her tongue at him, her warm smile becoming forced now, fingers in his hair getting more vigorous compared to the gentle ruffling of mere seconds ago. Bem is not sure what she is trying to do but he knows he will have to borrow Bela’s comb later; his hair now looking like a bird’s nest. There’s a sudden intake of breath on Bela’s part as her fingers catch up on something hard and pointy and her eyes widen in surprise; she is touching Bem’s horns. The owner of the horns himself doesn’t know how to feel about this unexpected sensation; the unmoving fingers on his horns feel alien but it is not ticklish, nor sickening. The feeling, much like the whole situation, is plainly weird. Bem blinks, his eyelashes fluttering, as he gives Bela a hesitant glance, wondering what she is planning to do now, or if she wants him to do something instead. There are thoughts running wild in Bem’s head as this is the rare time when he doesn’t know what to do. Bem feels so lost, and that is the exact worst moment when Bela decides to act on emotion; she surges forward, her dark red lips in a bow, eyes protruded, one of her hands still on Bem’s horns to pull “her partner” towards her. They then freeze up, too caught in the weirdness of the moment to comprehend its sheer ridiculousness; Bem, half-bowing, the look of utter confusion on his face as he stares at Bela’s face, scrunched up in her effort to keep an exaggerated version of kissy faces she saw women make in movies. Unfortunately, the moment of their failure is never to remain a secret between the two, as a second later the door slams open and Belo walks in, humming a merry tune. He stop and blinks confusedly at the paralysed with terror couple just to give them a blinding smile and cry out in an excited high-pitched voice, “So that’s what humans call sex!”

---


la fin
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